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18th-Oct-2015 09:10 am - need equation
antenna girl
Dear LJ Genie

I need an equation I can easily plug into a BASIC program. I need to draw several sizes of ellipse, all with the same focal points but different major axis sizes.

Call the distance bettween the foci D.

So the foci would be on the X-axis at -0.5D and +0.5D. And the major axis would be expressed in terms of D.

I'm sure there's some simple way to work this, but I haven't had any luck finding it.
17th-May-2015 05:34 pm - medical question
antenna girl
For something I'm writing, I need to know when doctors and other medical personnel not familiar with a patient would ask a female appearing patient questions like "when was your last period?", "when was your last gyno exam?" etc.

Patient is high school aged.

Basically any questions they wouldn't ask a male patient.

Also, I know that for some tests & drugs (and possibly other situations) they get rather insistent about "Is there any chance you may be pregnant?"

Y'see said character *isn't* female, so much "fun" is likely to ensue in such situations.

(I've got a trans friend who hasn't even begun to transition, but has been asked when the last time they had a pap smear was by a new doctor. But they are way past high school age, so I expect the questions and situations will be a lot different)

ps. This is fiction, but set in something resembling the real world.

If you are curious, the parts I've already written are here:
25th-Mar-2015 03:49 pm - More iPod problems
Dear LJ Genie, who has answered many iPod questions for me:

I own an iPod Touch 5th generation. Over the holiday season I downloaded a lot of Christmas music on to it. I downloaded it directly from the iTunes store to the iPod rather than connecting the iPod to my computer and transferring the music that way.

Once December was over I tried to remove the music, but no matter what I do, I cannot remove any songs from the iPod. I've used two different computers. I've checked and unchecked songs. I've selected the option to manually manage music and videos. I've unselected the option. I've downloaded all the iPod and iTunes updates. I've Googled the problem and tried all the suggestions that I've found on various websites, but nothing changes.

In addition, I have found that I also cannot add music to the iPod when I connect it to the computer. I recently purchased a CD and added it to my iTunes library, but I cannot transfer the songs to my iPod even though iTunes claims they were transferred successfully. Yes, I bought an actual CD, because the music is not available in the iTunes store.

Other than completely wiping the iPod by restoring it to factory settings, is there anything that I can do to resolve this problem?
31st-Jan-2015 09:31 am - redirecting weir urls
antenna girl
Dear LJgenie
We've switched my domain o a new host and have an "interesting problem.

The old host (a Cobalt RaQ4) dealt with user subdomains like this:

UserX of domain example.com would have his homepage at:


The new host uses more coneventional subdomains:


We'd like to be able to redirect requests for the old urls to the new ones, but can't figure out how.

Anybody know how? Or at leasty kno what the old style subdomain aer "officially" called so we can google for info?
22nd-Jan-2015 01:37 pm - Playing DLNA content *on* a PC
antenna girl
Dear LJ Genie
I've got a DLNA server on my LAN. I'm tryiong to figure out how a friend can play files from it on his Windows 7 laptop.

All my searches keep turning up stuff on configuring a PC *as* a DLNA srver, not playing content *from* a DLNA server on the PC.

24th-Dec-2014 04:32 pm - Xylophone ringtone sound-alike
xmas fluffy
Dearest LJ Genie,

As a Christmas gift to my father, I hope someone might know what 70s era TV show theme is a sound alike for the iPhone ringtone "xylophone". For reference: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XbwZhVyzovU

We've ruled out American Beauty (which is what it reminds me of) and Dad is sure it's much older than the last decade and is pretty sure about the TV part.

I've scoured Google and seen some agreement about the feeling that there is an answer, but no one could put their finger on the same thing my dad is thinking of.

Much appreciated!
2nd-Mar-2014 12:45 pm - Windows media player aggravations
antenna girl
Dear LJ Genie,

In older verions of WMP, "Now Playing" listed the name of the item and the time. InWMP 11, it only lists the time if I drag the now playing window much bigger and has this huge gap between the name and the time for "ratings".

I don't want the ratings, as they are completely bogus anyway. But I can't find a way to get rid of them. I've seen references to sorting the things displayed, but they all mention menu options that just plain aren't there.

Mae by igrab
Oh wise and benevolent genie,

I am searching for another well loved American PC video game I had enjoyed in 1999. It features a redheaded girl ptotagonist on a skateboard who solves a cross word on artists throughout history (including French Impressionists and American artists like Man Ray).

The graphics are cartoon like. The game also features beautiful jazz music, and an 'evil scientist'villain. It has maths puzzles where you must rearrange wooden barrels by size (to escape from the room the scientist's minions trapped you in). You must fit together squashed cars in the shapes of triangles and squares to achieve certain shapes / silhouettes. What is the game called?

Thank you, LJ genie! :)

Edit: I found out I actually did make an earlier post in 2010 on trying to find this game. *headlaptop* I'd completely forgotten. Apologies for reposting!
24th-Nov-2013 03:08 am - Outlook Express filtering.
antenna girl
Dear Lj Genie

I'm trying to help someone who is using Outlook Express and is subscribed to a mailing list I host.

The problem is that apparently OE has to way to automatically move messages to a folder based on the Sender: line in the headers. Which is pretty much the *only* reliable way to seperate list messages from private replies to list messagae.

Anybody know of any trick that'd work (note that relying on list messages having a string such as [list name]" in the subject line does *not* work, as private replies can have that in the subject as well if the person replying didn't think to edit the subject).
8th-Nov-2013 06:20 pm - Lear or Carroll and Didactic Sources
I <3 God, sheepie
Oh great learned LJ Genie,

I have a research paper that I need to write for my British Literature class.  It has to be an argumentative paper.  I would like to take the position saying that Edward Lear's nonsense writings are didactic.  However, I cannot find any peer reviewed articles for decent sources.

I have used Google and other search engines.  I've search the journal databases that I am allowed to search through my college's library.

If there is truly nothing on Edward Lear, I'll work with Lewis Carroll instead.  However, I've not been able to find anything for him, either.  Can you please help?
28th-Jun-2013 12:29 pm - conversion camps/programs
antenna girl
Dear LJ Genie,

I recall reading about the various "camps" and "programs" that are essentially thinly disguised brainwashing to "fix" kids to be what their parents want. Most seem to be at least somewhat fundamentalist.

I'm especially interested in the ones that are outside the US f(because they can get away with more there).

I ask because I'm thinking about writing a story involving getting some kids out of one.

any pointers will be appreciated.
7th-Jun-2013 09:05 pm - AVG nag screen
antenna girl
Dear LJ Genie

A month or so back, when my AVG Free notified me of an update, it gave me a chance for a "free trial" of the full package. Alas, I was dumb enough to say yes. As I more or less expected, I started getting nag screens as the trial period neared the end.

What I did *not* expect was that once the trial period ended, it *continues* to inflict nag screens on me. The only "options" are but it (no way) or "remind me later" with the "feature" of being able to set the frequency of nags as up to 10 days.

Anybody know how to get *rid* of the damned nag screen. Hopefully there's something short of doing an uninstall that'll do it.

I'm going to tell AVG that this is *not* the way to get customers. Heck, they've managved to confirm that I'll go for an extension on a site license for something else rather than buy their package.
30th-May-2013 06:32 pm - Firefox toolbars
antenna girl
Help me, LJ Genie, you're my only hope!

I've got Firefox on 5 computers. On 4 of them the "toolbars" are in this order:

menu bar
Address bar
bookmarks toolbar
tabs bar with all the open sessions on it

On the 5th system it's like this:

menu bar
tabs bar with all the open sessions on it
Address bar
bookmarks toolbar

Anybody know how to move the tabs bar to the same place as on the other 4?
Dear LJ Genie, whose cell phone does what it is supposed to do:

I have an HTC cell phone, specifically a Wildfire S. The phone came with a Twitter app called "HTC Peep." A few months ago Peep stopped updating, but I didn't worry about it because I could still access Twitter through the mobile website if I wished to. I could still use Peep to post pictures to Twitter, though; I just had to tap the picture and select "Peep" as the app I wanted to send it to.

A few days ago, though, Peep stopped working entirely. If I try to use it, it tells me that "multiple accounts are not supported" I have no idea what this means. I logged out of the Twitter mobile website. I cleared all the data and the cache from the app. No dice. Every time I try to use Peep or send a picture to Twitter, I get the same response: "Multiple accounts are not supported." I Googled the problem and got a grand total of one hit from someone having the same problem with the same app. They also reported clearing the cache and it having no effect.

I cannot download a different Twitter client because the phone doesn't have enough storage space for one, (the phone doesn't have enough storage for ANYTHING), and it won't load any Twitter apps to an SD card.

Do you have any suggestions, LJ Genie?
13th-Nov-2012 07:39 pm(no subject)
cabbage, fractals
Dear most brilliant ljgenie, whose calls always go through:

What is the procedure for calling a US cell phone number from New Zealand?  To be clear: you are in New Zealand. You are using a landline. You want to speak to someone in the US, who has a US cell phone, whose number is in the format XXX-XXX-XXXX.

I have googled this (which told me that they should dial 00 1 XXX-XXX-XXXX) but I would like to hear first-hand experience if possible. I am trying to get my bank to call me to confirm something and they swear they called me and there was no answer. But I have no record of such a call, and also I have been glued to my phone because this call is very important (and for security reasons needs to be initiated by them, apparently), so I'm wondering if they're doing something wrong with the dialing.
6th-Nov-2012 01:39 pm - Facebook
antenna girl
Dear LJ Genie,

Facebook keeps sending me these "Do you know XXXX?" messages. I don't know the people it's referring and don't want to.

Is there any way to tell Facebook not to keep asking me about the *same* people over and over again?

With Friend requests at least I cab decline nd that *usually* stops it. But this gets *really* annoying.
27th-Oct-2012 06:10 pm - Firefox hogging CPU
antenna girl
Dear LJ Genie,

Starting a few weeks back Firefox went from being slow to being *abysmally* slow.

It was also dragging down the rest of the system. Windows Task Manager showed it was using 90% or more of the CPU cycles even when I wasn't doing anything other than having a dozen or so tabs open.

After some googling, I added noscript & Flashblock and removed the java cnsole from the add-ons.

This got rid of the CPU hogging during "idle". But whenever I open a new tab or load a new page in an existing tab, the CPU usage pegs again.

Worse, page loading has gotten insanely slow. I just timed a couple of tmblr pages at 5 & 6 minutes to load.

Any ideas as to what the F is going on? The system is running Win2k (yeah, I know) has a 1.7 GHz CPU and 2 gig of ram.
18th-Oct-2012 04:01 pm - What's this leaf?
Florges [pokémon]

Oh LJGenie, who knows more about trees than I do,

What tree does this leaf come from?

Under the cut for size...Collapse )

Thank you!

Posted via LiveJournal app for iPhone.

17th-Oct-2012 04:47 pm - mystery art
bad day baby
O Genie, this art loving supplicant humbly requests a small bit of your vast knowledge..

Recently I bought this at an antique show, though it itself is not an antique, I am assuming it is a replica of a relief from somewhere.  The seller knew nothing about this piece, not even its name (her family refers to it as sexyman), and I'd really like to call it by its (his) real name and learn something about it.

Can you tell me anything about this piece (the original), where it is from, the name, the artist...anything.


Thank you.

FOUND  \o/
Prompted by a few suggestions, I tried doing some (...more, 'cuz I already did some searches) google image searches and with the title "high relief man's torso" I found this...  http://lh3.ggpht.com/-Vl06896ICQM/RzLGCLnQKeI/AAAAAAAAEGs/MpFrcG5d1qw/P1050705.JPG
Sorry I can't seem to get the actual photo to upload.

28th-Sep-2012 03:10 pm - Converting .swf files
Dear LJ Genie, to whom I run when I am at my wits' end:

I am attempting to transcribe several files that are in the format .swf. Unfortunately, the transcription software that I use, which works with a foot pedal, does not support .swf format. I've tried five different types of conversion software -- some are free, and others are free trials of paid software -- and none of them seem to work. Some don't run at all. Some run but with errors. Some run but won't accept the particular file I'm trying to convert. One was called simply "Free SWF Converter." Another one was from a company called Softpedia. Another was Lumixsoft SWF to AVI MPEG Convert. Another was SWF Video Converter. So far, I've had no luck. I tried the video downloader tool that is an add-on to Firefox, and it also failed to convert the files.

I really don't want to pay for software, because that will eat up the entire paycheque I get from doing this job. But neither do I want to constantly hit play, pause, type, rewind, play, pause, type, etc. ad nauseum. I'm getting extremely frustrated, and I want to get this job done and get paid but it's very slow going when I can't use my foot pedal.

Any suggestions, LJ Genie?
27th-Sep-2012 01:00 pm - Zone alarm
antenna girl
Dear LJ Genie

Ok, since my old preffered firewall has changed to have a *mandatory* AV component (and I'm quite happy with my current AV program) I installed Zonealarm on one of my systems. I mostly am using it for backing up stuff from other system and the like, so I hadn't run into any problems until today.

I started Firefox and couldn't get to any sites. So I opened a command window and found that I couldn't even ping the router.

I can get both to work by completely disabling the "application control" in ZoneAlarm. But I can't get the browser to work at even *minimum* security. Or rather, I can add it to the list of programs, with "wide open" security. But next time I check the list, it's no longer on it.

WTF? This is *insane* Especially since there are no help screens in the free version, and apparently no way to set ZA to default to *asking* me when something tries to access the net (or even other systems on my LAN).

This is so broken I'd rather turn it off and just trust to the router's security.
16th-Aug-2012 10:08 pm - Micro SD Cards
Dear LJ Genie, who knows so much more than anyone:

How the heck do I get a micro SD card out of its adapter? I did a Google search and the search results said, assuming that you hadn't either put the card into its adapter backwards or gotten it wet -- and I know I haven't done that because the computer was able to put files on to the card, and the card is fresh out of the package -- that all you have to do is push it in and pull it back out. Well, I've tried that. I've broken a few fingernails in the process, and the damn card is still in its adapter. Do you have any other suggestions, LJ Genie? I am getting extremely frustrated and have used a number of swear words.



Edited to add: this is what it looks like:

10th-Aug-2012 09:49 am(no subject)
Oh wise and all-knowing ljgenie, please heed my plea.

I remember seeing somewhere, a single-panel cartoon of a desperado attempting a getaway on his trusty steed, while the sheriff is walking up saying something like "I knew you'd try to escape, so I took the precaution of removing your horse's brain". Where was it? My google-fu has failed me, you're my last remaining hope.
not the one
Oh Tech-wise Genie,

I apologize for bothering you again so recently; I am a high school Chemistry teacher preparing for the beginning of the school year.

Because I changed schools and would no longer have access to a document camera, I purchased a Wacom Bamboo Capture tablet & pen. My reasoning was since I have almost my entire curriculum digitally, I could simply bring them up on the school PC and annotate them in front of the students (the PC would be hooked up to a projector). Office 2007 has this feature built in; I just need a program that would let me write on my previously created PDFs.

Certain items I ONLY have as PDFs, worksheets from the book publisher, labs, etc, so I would like to be able to write on them live while the students are watching. Bonus if I can share the writings later, but this is not a deal breaker by any means.

I would investigate this more thoroughly myself, but I have a Mac at home, and only 1 chance to get the tech guy to install the program at work.

Thank you for all of your help & suggestions!!!
5th-Aug-2012 09:18 am - Firewall
antenna girl
Help me LJ Genie, you're my only hope.

(crossposted from bipolypagangeek)

Any recommendations for a firewall for Windoze? The one I'd been using decided that they had to expand to a combo package that integrates Firewall & anti-virus. I've got an AV I'm perfectly happy with (F-prot).

I'm currently limping along with the freebie Norton package I can get as a Comcast subscriber, but it's just too annoying for words. Not only does it *not* let my turn off the AV part of the package, but when it runs the "background scans" (which, as I said, can't be turned off) it *ignores* the exclusuions I set. So it keeps reporting stuff as "needing action". Including files from a drive that's no longer in the system. Grr.

So, I need a free/cheap AV program that *doesn't* include anything else. Windows built-in AV is not remotely trustworthy in my opinion. Mostly because when I switched to the one I was using, I found out how often Windows was "phoning home" without letting me know what was going on.
Anyway, I need somethiing that will work with XP (and Win2k if possible, for an older box I've got).

And working with Win 7 when I get a new box, would be a plus as well.
not the one
Oh Genie with far better Google-fu than I,

Before I was a chemistry teacher, I came across what I remember to be a 1 page, yellow and black warning sheet or MSDS about the dangers of Dihydrogen Monoxide. It was satirical, concise, and I would love to use it to test/mock my students' critical thinking skills. I have searched Google high and low, and have found several sites and pages, but none like the original.

The results I have found are either VERY lengthy, or are more websites than a 1 page concise sheet that I can have waiting for them at the beginning of class.

On the off chance that someone has it bookmarked, saved, or can direct me to it, I would be grateful!!!
25th-Jun-2012 10:51 pm - Mounting phone as disk drive
flying spaghetti monster
Dear LJ Genie, who can always get pictures off hir phone:

I have an HTC Wildfire cell phone. When I plug it into my computer, it is supposed to ask me if I want to connect as a disk drive or just charge it. Normally I say "just charge it" because I seldom take pictures with my phone.

I do sometimes use the phone camera, but suddenly the phone won't become a disk drive and I can't get the pictures from it unless I get a micro SD card adapter so that my computer can read the teeny tiny SD card that came with the phone. It doesn't ask me if I want to enable disk use. I went into the settings and chose my default connection type as "disk drive," but the phone does not show up as a disk drive in Windows Explorer. I switched back to "always ask me," but it doesn't ask me.

Dear LJ Genie, what should I do with this *&^% phone to get it to cooperate and turn into a disk drive when I plug it into my computer?
31st-May-2012 09:01 am - RTF to "plain text"
antenna girl
Dear LJ Genie,

I've got a friend who uses his MP4 player as an ebook reader. But it only supports text files.

I'm looking for something that will convert RTF (or epub, or other formats, but RTF is the main one) to "enhanced" plain text.

That'd be text with *bold*, /italics/ & _underline_.

I'm pretty sure I ran into something that'd do that once, but it was a long time ago.
10th-Apr-2012 01:53 pm(no subject)
cabbage, fractals
Dear Genie, nerdiest of nerds,

Can you point me toward anything scholarly/nerdy/academic about constructions such as "I just wanted to say that..." and the like?

I find myself writing that pretty often (in casual contexts) and then I get neurotic and think that it would be better to just say whatever I want to say. And, I mean, I am actually saying it after I write that, not just wanting to say it.  And yet that phrase does serve a purpose of some sort, I think. It softens things in some way. Basically, I'd like to read other people's musings on this, but I'm having a hard time finding them via google. Also, I'm not looking for very prescriptivist stuff about whether it's correct, just an examination of it, sort of like the Steven Pinker TED talk that discusses how saying "If you could pass the guacamole, that would be awesome" at the dinner table is an exaggeration and also is not a direct request but is still a useful way to phrase things for various reasons.

4th-Apr-2012 02:53 pm - Adobe Digital Editions and Ebooks
cat dreaming
Dear LJ Genie, who knows all about ebooks and ebook software:

I purchased an ebook through Kobo.com, thinking I would be able to read it either on the Kobo app on my iPod Touch or on the Kobo desktop application. However, the book didn't show up in my Kobo library. I emailed Kobo, and they told me that this book is only readable through Adobe Digital Editions -- in fact, the DRM is specifically linked to Adobe Digital Editions. You can't read it on iPods or iPhones or any other smartphone, nor on the Kobo desktop app. You can't get the ePub file on your computer without having Adobe Digital Editions successfully installed on your computer, so you can't use another ePub reader to read the book.

I have tried multiple times to install Adobe Digital Editions on my desktop computers (two of them) and on my laptop computer. Every time I try, I get the same message: "Server communication problem: E_ADEPT_REQUEST_EXPIRED." Every Google search I do tells me that I must open the ebook (using Adobe Digital Editions) the moment I download it, or I will get this error. The problem is, I get this error when I have no ebooks on my computer. I get this error when I am trying to install the Adobe software for the first time.

The Adobe help page says that this error means my computer clock is wrong. They don't give me any way of me finding out HOW it is wrong. Is it fast? Is it slow? Is it off by two minutes, one minute, 30 seconds?

I use a program called Chameleon Clock on my computers, so I disabled Chameleon Clock to see if that made a difference. It did not. Still the same error. My computer's clock settings tell me that the time is checked multiple times a day using Internet time synchronization.

I've tried asking Kobo for a refund because I cannot read their book, but they tell me that there is nothing WRONG with their book; there is something wrong with my computer, and that's not their fault, so no refund for me. They tell me they are able to run Adobe Digital Editions just fine, and they are able to open the book just fine, so it's not their problem.

What the heck am I supposed to do? I don't want to buy another copy of this book from Amazon when I've already bought and paid for it from Kobo. But I've tried multiple times to install Adobe Digital Editions and no matter what I do, it won't install. So now I've wasted the money I spent on this book with no way to get it back.
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